Thankful List

1-God. I don't know what to write here. I am thankful for being beautiful in his eyes even when I am a hot mess. I am grateful for the voice I heard a voice that told me to listen. I heard through all the noise in my head, the bad decisions, the self-doubt, the anger, sadness and frustrations with what life had become for me.

2-Abuse and poverty. I am thankful that my childhood and some of my adult relationships have been layered with abuse issues. I feel that those struggles have made me more compassionate. My empathy (perhaps there is a bone for that one too) has increased in ways that are incalculable. And, while the negative impacts have been a struggle...my "story" has allowed me to be a better friend, mother, coworker, partner, listener and healer.

3-Family. This one is big. So, I am grateful for the negative impacts family has had. And, that has only made me stronger and more able to realize the struggles of others. It has also made me thankful that my daughter has a wonderful father and to be a better mother to my own children. But, I am appreciative of  my grandparents, aunts and uncles, and other extended relatives who have been integral in my success on a microscopic level.

4-My children. This goes universally. I have spent almost two decades being a mother. I can truly say that they have impacted my life in far more positive ways that any other human has. They are strong and creative. They are intuitive and wise beyond their years. They are funny. They make me laugh and cry tears of joy.

5-An ever growing list of people that have steered me in different directions with love, genuine care and compassion. This list is organic so forgive me if I miss a few...Leland Foreman, Ms. Rhodman, Fred Robertson, Shannon Malloy, Amy Black, Elizabeth T., Carol Johnson, Steve, Jason, Sarah, Emily, Cassie, Christy, Lisa, Myca, Kandi, Mary, Renee, Ryan, Julia, Brennan, Shawn, Tim, Brian, Holly, Danielle, Troy, Lauren, Chris, Jennifer, Kristopher, Mark, Claudia, Mindy, Justin, Sarah, Missy, Lindsey, Meghan, Mal, Dan, Heather, Michelle, Jen, Jaki, Scott, John, Matt, Taylor, Barbara, Molly, Maurice, Laurie, Denee, Kim, Tanya, Paula, Bob...and the list could go on and on.

6-Everything else. I am thankful for creation, love affairs, break-ups and heartaches, dance and music, laughter, books, words, warm blankets and heat, a car that drives, makeup and shoes, vintage and new, my dog, hugs, birds and nature, church, silence, noise, beauty in unlikely places, sarcasm and sensitivity, my doctors (primary, dentist, cardiologist, oncologist), therapist, and teachers.