To make bread...

Ok, so I need to start this day with an apology. This is a public apology for not reading a book that someone gifted to me last Valentine's Day. I didn't find spiritual/theological books "romantic". So, I shelved it and more than a year later...I  picked it up and began reading what seemed like letters to myself/from myself, prayers to God/words from God, and hugely inspirational. So, Ryan...I'm sorry that I was such a jerk. Really.

This crazy life is full of uncertainties. For real. I get it. But, then there are things we (or at least I am) are so very certain of. Like breathing...I need it. I always need to breathe. There is never a moment that breathing becomes unnecessary. Love. Rest. Faith. Food.  I put a period and capitalize all of these because individually, each can sustain us. When we don't feel loved, the faith that we are in fact loved can nudge us through a seemingly endless wilderness. When life is too much, a nap can be the holiest of endeavors. And, for my minister friends...the Eucharist (for the rest of us, including me...a simple meal) can be life-saving. Those of you that know me or have read this blog, know how important food is to me. But, the journey of the last two years and mostly the last eighteen months has definitively shown me that my story is so connected to God's story.

Back to the book...I'm going to include the two quotes that made me sigh out loud. Yes.

1-“To make bread or love, to dig in the earth, to feed an animal or cook for a stranger—these activities require no extensive commentary, no lucid theology. All they require is someone willing to bend, reach, chop, stir. Most of these tasks are so full of pleasure that there is no need to complicate things by calling them holy. And yet these are the same activities that change lives, sometimes all at once and sometimes more slowly, the way dripping water changes stone. In a world where faith is often construed as a way of thinking, bodily practices remind the willing that faith is a way of life.”
― Barbara Brown Taylor, An Altar in the World: A Geography of Faith

A couple of things...I often get into a debate with a minister regarding the church. That the church is somehow separate from life, the world, material things. And, while to a certain extent, I will buy that. I don't believe that we need to overcomplicate the space of worship with tweeting, Facebook, gadgets, and iPads...I do believe that service, faith, and love are all actionable affairs. If we simply talk about doing, propose change, and discuss our love for one another...is it real? We can see the tree that exists and the hole left when it's uprooted. We can see scars left from abusive relationships. We see the shivering bodies in the cold when they have no home to warm them. So, to simply watch others do service and "manage" teams is perhaps more harmful than it seems. Feeding others, washing the feet of our friends, wrapping them in a warm blanket is not only symbolic of our faith and love...it is in fact the faith and love itself.

The bigger question is, what keeps us from acting? What keeps us from seeing each other and loving a stranger? I wonder if it's that in seeing the Other, might that make us more visible? Do we really want to be seen, or are we afraid?


2-“Wisdom is not gained by knowing what is right. Wisdom is gained by practicing what is right, and noticing what happens when that practice succeeds and when it fails.”
― Barbara Brown Taylor, An Altar in the World: A Geography of Faith

Scary stuff. How important is it to "know" that the recipe for something will turn out? I'd like everything to work. Realistically, it's not how I operate. I know what flavors work together for the most part. And, sometimes the end result is an epic fail. But, what fun it is to rummage through my pantry and create a meal out of what we have.

I think for me that's what life has become, digging deep in my personal arsenal or pantry from which to give and offering it all up to whomever sits, stands, weeps in front of me. Then, surrounding myself with people who do the same. Some days we are all a hot mess, laying in ruins together. But, most days someone has the wherewithal to lift us up and we are able to take turns.

One of the best memories I have of food, love, and service was on a recent trip to New Orleans. My dear friend Manda and I traveled to New Orleans for a weekend. It was a quick trip and symbolic of some big changes in both of our lives. She had never been and I was visiting a placed beloved to me and so many others with different lenses. But, an old friend from school lives and works on a farm outside of the city. She works with amazing chefs and restaurateurs.  So, we got the "industry", "I know the chef" treatment when we went out to dinner. I remember Manda so vividly saying how "full" she was after eleven courses and two bottles of wine. But, she kept trying new things and "eating the love". Manda is like 90 pounds, so there is no concern of gaining weight. Obviously, the rest of us have that to contend with. But, what a beautiful experience to "be loved" in a restaurant. My friend Jo is loved by the food community in New Orleans. And, by extension Manda and I were loved and served in such a way.

So back to that bread...errr Eucharist. I think feeding is a lost art. Those that do it well, do it with love and true vision. So, see each other, love each other, and feed each other...perhaps then, we can start to undo some of the damage we have done to one another and this earth. Today, all I am focusing on is seeing those around me and maybe in seeing them...I can see a piece of myself. But, I know I will definitely see pieces of God all around me.